I want to browse your Myspace profile, but it's just so loud! I mean, both literally and figuratively. Your loud song plays immediately but you have so much html loading on your page that I can't even get in there to pause it. So I just end up bothering the coworkers in adjacent cubes by playing your loud song for 12 seconds or more before I give up and click back to my homepage. I mean really, where is your sense of decency?

I'd love the opportunity to look at your profile and see your favorite movies, and possibly body type. But all I know about you is that you posted a comment on my ex-boyfriend's page (where I linked from) and really like Journey (who doesn't?)! I just don't have the patience to wait while your complicated and visually loud profile loads. So I guess we'll never be more than what we are: friends of friends of friends.

It's really too bad - we might have had something special. But I simply can't keep bothering my neighbors with your loud song. And I can't be bothered to turn down my volume. So I guess we're at an impasse. Unless, that is...you decide to reset your Myspace preferences to play your song manually, or you opt for a simpler layout. But why would you do that for someone you don't know that well, or at all for that matter? Maybe...the hope for a more sanctimonious virtual community? A better virtual existence for posterity? The choice is yours.