Not all dorks created equal

Turns out, fantasy dorks and theatre dorks are not the same kind of dork. The stage adaptation of Lord of the Rings (part musical, part play, all extravaganza) opened last week in London to mixed reviews. It had great potential, considering it is the most expensive stage production on record at $25 million - and we all know budget correlates directly with quality.

But apparently hardcore LOTR fans weren't feeling remiss in the absence of a Rodgers and Hammerstein Tolkien interpretation. One reviewer said his 14-year-old son left the show "tittering at the ponderous inanities of the script and the triteness of the lyrics." I then tittered imagining a 14-year-old boy tittering. Other people liked the show, though - including reviewers in the London Times and the Guardian.

I probably won't make it to London to see the LOTR stage spectacle. But I'm definitely going to miss out on ballads like "Hobbit-sized dreams" and company numbers like "Mordor ain't no place for dancin'!"*

*Not real titles from LOTR The Musical

Fiat Lux Jazz!

Okay. Occasionally something comes along that gets me so fired up I have to share it with everyone I come in contact with. Some of you may already be hip to these figures, but the gravity of this effort just hit me, so it's likely many of you, too, are still...in the dark.

This is one of the cheapest, smartest, easiest ways to help with energy conservation that I have encountered. CFL bulbs (Compact Fluorescent Light), the swirl bulbs, cost about $3 - but each one used conserves an incredible amount of energy. They also save you (the consumer) money, and reduce greenhouse gas emissions from power plants. Here are some fantastic figures (source):

- If every household replaced just one regular bulb with a CFL bulb, it would save enough energy to power a city of 1.5 million people, or all the homes in Delaware and Rhode Island

-If every household replaced one bulb, it would be the equivalent of taking 1.3 million cars off the road in terms of greenhouse gas reduction

- The typical U.S. house has between 50-100 sockets. Each swirl bulb pays for itself in energy cost savings in just 5 months. And they each last 6-8 years - about 10x longer than regular bulbs.

These numbers reveal the incredible power of individuals to make big changes through small efforts. And since nearly 100 million households* already read this blog, the changes should happen by the end of the day today. But why not go buy a 4-pack for your home and just change 4 bulbs at once? Then tell 10 of your friends?

Look for the swirl bulb with the Energy Star on the box. Pick up a pack this weekend! Make it happen! I'm proud of you!

*Estimate

When Sturgeon Strike!

A jet skiier was knocked unconscious over the weekend when she collided with a jumping sturgeon. Both she and the fish survived the incident but it's got people talking about the rise in fish-related accidents on the Suwannee River in Florida. In 2006 there were a total of 10 people hurt in human-sturgeon collisions resulting from sturgeon jumping.

If these people sound lame, the sturgeon is actually a sizeable threat: the fish, aside from being scary and prehistoric-looking, can be 8 feet long and weigh up to 200 pounds. It's incredible they can even hoist themselves out of the water, really. One woman, after colliding with a sturgeon, had to have 3 fingers reattached by a surgeon. Not to be confused with sturgeon. A man brings his son to the emergency room for an operation. The sturgeon says, "I can't operate on him - he's my son." You know the rest.

Florida Fish and Wildlife has created an acronym motto for water safety on the Suwannee, S.L.O.W.: Sturgeon Leap Out of Water. They're very literal!

Great News

Maria Bamford! posted a new comment about you at 6/12/2007 4:39 PM Inbox

New MySpace Comment

Maria Bamford! has posted a new comment about you on MySpace! Click the link below to read the …

(You know the rest)

What a great day! My comedy mentor has officially taken me under her wing. I'm sure that's what the comment says. "Dear Jessie: Yes, I will take you under my wing and together we will soar over supple angel-bottoms and Carebear tears." I don't even need to look at the comment to know that's what it says. Her Special Deluxe videos rule.

To Catch a Predator, Youtube Edition

Youtube is scary sometimes. A lot of times. If you haven't yet seen the video of this life-like Japanese child robot, you should, and if you have, go back and read some of the comments posted by the night stalkers and shut-ins that haunt the webwaves. In particular I enjoyed the insights into the mind of one "flyp1001," who offers a clear thesis on preferred uses for robot technology:

.............................................................................

flyp1001 (2 days ago)

Can it be programmed to give a bj?
(Reply) (Spam)

rubbbe (2 days ago)
yes
(Reply) (Spam)

flyp1001 (2 days ago)

I want to hold it and kiss it like it's never been kissed before.
(Reply) (Spam)

Caael (2 days ago)

Terrifying!
(Reply) (Spam)

flyp1001 (2 days ago)

I want to have sex with that thing!
(Reply) (Spam)

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ChrisHansenPredatorNBC:
Hey Flyp1001...what are you doing here?

Happy Birthday Michael Cera

This guy kills me. Literally, he has murdered me over 100 times. With delight!

Today's his birthday, I think he turns 11, if you haven't yet please check out the web series he developed with his friend Clark:

And leave a birthday comment! Such as "Happy birthday Michael, ur hot...lol!! ur funnier then Andersen Cooper". But not that one, obviously, it's been taken.

Chicks Obama Sex Gay Election

Prominent intrepid woman political commentator deems prominent intrepid woman politician the winner of last night's Democratic debate in New Hampshire.

As a prominent intrepid woman political commentator blog linker, I agree.

Whatever. I like her. I've liked her since I saw her speak in D.C. and she used logic to form arguments that investing in education and healthcare will make our country stronger and richer and safer. I liked that she was articulate and steadfast and a good communicator.

I also like that one of the questions in the debate last night was how the candidates would "use" former president Bill Clinton in their presidencies. Barack Obama had my favorite response:

Obama: … And I think that President Clinton’s vision of our interdependence globally is something — Now, obviously Senator Clinton may have something to say about how I use Bill Clinton. (Laughter.) So in fairness, she should be able to respond.

I don't know what this means. I think maybe it means sex. I'm not sure. It's funny.

I kind of love these candidates and they make me excited to participate in the democratic process.