Iraqis Hunted by Man-Eating Badgers

As if raw sewage and shrapnel weren't enough scary campfire story fodder, there is a new horror on the loose in Iraq. Rumors are flying throughout the port city Basra that giant man-eating badgers stalk the streets at night, attacking unsuspecting human prey. The monsters are reported to be much larger than common badgers, with giant claws and sharp teeth for ripping through flesh. (Watch the video!)

A spokesman for the British army issued a statement that there are honey badgers in Basra but they rarely attack humans, unless provoked. “They are native to the region but rare in Iraq. They're nocturnal carnivores with a fearsome reputation, but they don't stalk humans and carry them back to their lair,” he said.

Still, many Iraqis believe this animal appeared directly after Western occupation of the province, spawning conspiracy theories that U.S. or British forces unleashed the animal to spread fear throughout the city.

Wait. Huge badger-looking animals terrorizing the village, put there by authorities to strike fear in the hearts of citizens? Sounds like a good idea for a movie...but there has to be a twist ending! I think that was the twist ending.

Nikonography

Here are some incredible pictures from Nikon's "It's a small world" photomicrography competition (photos taken through a light microscope). Life is so beautiful. Check out the rest and rate the entries here.

It's the Final Countdown

Final Countdown

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This is my favorite clip in The Soup this week. It's from the show Singing Bee but that's irrelevant. I love so many things: the ultra-fast zoom, the pained look on the singer's face, the booty dancers, the synthesizer. Everything.

If I Blogged This (Book Review)

If I blogged this, not that I did, or would, but hypothetically speaking, if I blogged a book review about the book "If I Did It" by OJ Simpson, would you guys be mad at me?

Well, someone at work got a leaked copy and sent it around as a PDF file and I did skim it. Let's just say - OJ Simpson is a chronic modifier misplacer. I don't have the energy or the moral security to break down his commentary on the murders, but I think these two excerpts will suffice:

"I did a little acting, too, and for a number of years I was a pitchman for Hertz, the rental car people. Some of you might remember me from the television spots: I was always running late, pressed for time, leaping over fences and cars and piles of luggage to catch my flight. If you don't see the irony in that, you will."

Ironic. It was so "ironic" when I killed my wife and her lover. Ironic.

"A few days later, we flew down to Manzanilla, Mexico, for our honeymoon. We stayed in a beautiful place called Las Hadas and made love three times a day. That's why we were there, right? To give Nicole a family of her own."

Gross. It was "gross" when OJ Simpson described his lovemaking habits. Gross.

Anyway, those are basically the most important passages from the book, as far as I could gather. Quote them at your next social gathering! Impress your intellectual reader friends!

Like, Dead Dead?

China executed its former Food and Drug chief today for taking bribes to approve untested medicines that resulted in the deaths of 10 people. Zheng Xiaoyu was convicted last week of taking about $850,000 in bribes, was sentenced to death, and today it was carried out. Done, and dead. China executes more people each year than all other nations combined. Makes me almost change my mind about the coolness of Communism!

Being serious for a second, this makes me think a few thoughts. Although this case highlights the Chinese state's incredible efficiency, it still makes me grateful that although the Patriot Act and Homeland Security do infringe on our human rights, at least our corrupt officials are not being sentenced to death. They are being sentenced to 2 1/2 years in prison and then having that sentence commuted by the president whose interest they were serving. I don't think anyone needs to die over that.

* This is a Chinese mobile execution van that delivers deadly injections on the go!